Clamor

Yesterday if somebody asked me to classify noise, typically I would try to classify it based on different criteria: one being the source (e.g. human, machinery, nature - birds, water, etc.); another being quantitative attributes I can recall from my limited knowledge of physics (e.g. amplitude, frequency, etc.). But not anymore!

Today I learned there's only two kinds of noises: inside noise and outside noise. Outside noise is the noise that surrounds you; it originates from the world external to you. Inside noise is the one that comes from within you (well, not literally!). I would, any day, prefer outside noise to inside noise. Because, I know how to shut myself off from the outside noise, but I am still struggling to shut myself off from inside noise.

My mind has somewhat a multi-threaded architecture (pardon the software jargon). And it seems to have Professor Dumbledore's pensieve (hope the non-followers of Harry Potter won't mind this reference), where all my memories and thoughts seem to be stored away as threads. At any point of time, I might have more than one of these threads running continuously, hogging my brain (the CPU). There might, often, be context-switching based on thread-prioritization. Say, when I'm at work, I might be thinking about code, but the minute I'd step out alone for lunch, it'd switch to another thread (that might have been high-priority the night before).

At times I wish there were a room where I'd be able to shut the inside noise off as well by a mere jolt to the door. However, now that I've come to think of it, it might encourage me to confine myself to that room for longer and yet longer periods at a stretch. So, I guess I need to continue the hunt for the key to tranquility inside of me, so one day the whole world would be my room, and I could find my peace even in a deafeningly noisy lab.

Juxtaposed

Another stint with idle time, I had recently, made me realize I'm still no good at killing it; I mean, not if I don't have a modern-day addiction in the vicinity (a.k.a television, phone, computer, etc.). The first thing I yearned for was a computer. I did realize, though, that I'm a bit old-fashioned as well, because the second best thing felt like the book at my nightstand. I am one of those, to whom only a book can be a book - not it's printed copy, not it's soft-copy. I have tried even audio-books; nothing comes even close to an actual book.

Another weird old-fashioned streak in me, this thought makes me aware of, is my sincere liking for a coffee place in Connaught Place in Central Delhi. It's old and primitive; you can almost carbon-date it standing at its door, back to the years of black and white photography. The fact that it's located right across the street from an ultra-modern multiplex is enough to jolt anyone to the realization of it's juxta-positioning amidst the modern world, full of its flagship coffee houses, which are much too plastic in comparison to this humble coffee place.

The khaki-clad man at the kitchen counter (adorned with a khaki "neta" cap); the costliest coffee under twenty bucks; the potato fingers cut by hand and fried to home-made perfection (as opposed to the modern french fries cut in perfect cuboidals) - all shove you a step nearer to the accepting that civilization has complicated our lives. Coffee's not just coffee anymore, it's a choice one has to make from a sea of Lattes, cappucinos, mochas - not to mention the choice in sizes as well (Simple mathematics suggests that having 3 sizes, in fact, increases our choices three-fold).

Sometimes, when I wish to make life simple for myself and when there are too many choices to make, too many decisions awaiting a stand, I close my eyes and think of that coffee house. Sometimes, a cup of plain old coffee, potato fingers, a terrace swarmed by elderly reading their morning papers, a loved one by your side and a battered sofa make a perfect winter Sunday morning.

Yee-haw!

A country music video launched recently caught my attention today when I turned the TV on after a hectic day munching on my blueberries. It was a true "yee-haw" moment and I couldn't help but smile and laugh along as the lyrics hit my ears and the video flashed by. May I mention, it's very rare that I sit alone in a lonely house and laugh while watching TV (I do smile though, F.R.I.E.N.D.S is an obvious exception)! The video is as crisp as the lyrics (In fact, I recommend watching the video the first time, instead of just the audio). Without further adieu, may I recommend Blake Shelton's "Hillbilly Bone" (featuring Trace Adkins) - a masterpiece from the two hot'n'famous country boys. (On that note, I would also strongly recommend the movie "Beverly Hillbillies" - a hilarious comedy which shall tickle each of your 206 bones)

Talking about the song, a heart-hitting satire on the eccentricities of sophistication that cripples our society today is the butt of the joke here! Some of us have lost touch with the true us (minus the modern hullabaloo of table manners and public faces). Thus, our lives have somehow reduced to wrinkled peels from the plump, juicy, luscious peaches they used to be. In the singers' words, we all have a "hillbilly" bone deep down, and all one needs to do is get back in touch with it and all the fun would be back in our worlds! May we all find our "hillbilly bone"! Amen!

What's with all the wrapping?

This isn't a new post in my blog! It's a confession! I have this incomparable compulsion to pack all gifts, that go out to anyone from a group of people including me, myself. I don't even like the gift store doing it for me! In that context, I am Monica Geller from F.R.I.E.N.D.S. I HAVE to be "the wrapper", just like she HAD to be "the hostess". Not just that, there has to be a knot or bow on top (refer the image above if you don't trust me on that one!). Layering is an icing on the cake! Fabric wraps, nets, ribbons, little motifs in golden foil, binding wires covered in silver foil, scissors to chafe the ribbon to curls are all the love of my life! And, I like to spend my own sweet time with the gift doing it all. At times I have wondered if I could connect to Monica at more than one levels, just because of my ability to showcase tid-bits of OCD in my life.

The fact, that I CANNOT go to sleep without laying out the clothes, shoes and everything for the next day during the week, does not make me any less cuckoo! And I mean it when I say I CANNOT. I've actually had to debate myself for five minutes before diving out of the bed finally to get it done. Now, you might shake that one off as a tiny abnormality, but I am sure you would not be able to write off the one coming.

Although most of my friends have witnessed "the wrapper-syndrome", they are, most probably, not aware of the fact that my conditioner always ALWAYS sits on the outer side of my shampoo. Now, I am sure you must be dying to know why! .... Well, I'll let you in on the secret behind it (only after I find it out, that is)!

No strings attached

The happiest moment I can recall in the recent times was when I was standing on the Las Vegas street with multimedia screen on the ceiling. Very rarely, in life, do we feel really free alone (not aloof), and truly happy.

I was elated to be standing amongst total strangers and enjoying a show (right above me), with one of my most favorite soundtracks, smiling to myself, tapping my feet, singing along; in a nutshell, having the time of my life. Sometimes being with people you cherish is only the next best thing to being with yourself!

Those were eight of the best minutes of my life, which is why I would, probably, never want to go back to that street.

The roller-coaster even Walt Disney did not dream of

Here I am, 3 months and a week of California, a flight to New York, a quick session of re-packing, a flight to Miami, a 4-day cruise to Bahamas, four evenings of wobbling on waters, four 4-course dinners, a martini night, a white night, a ping-pong session with my most missed sibling and friend, several rounds of Blackjack, a jacuzzi session, a family raft adventure, a failed attempt at para-sailing (due to mechanical fault), a dark Bohemian tan on top of a Cali tan, a drive to Orlando, 7 days of walking from 9 am through 9 pm at Disney, a walk through Mickey's house, a visit to Cinderella's castle, a surprise party with friends for Minnie's birthday, a free fall from 13th story in the Hollywood Hotel, a peep into my eco-friendly future, an 1100-mile drive to New York, a stint with Georgia, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia, New Jersey and New York weekend/holiday traffic, a fever due to exertion and a round of honey-ginger-lemon teas, and 1600 photographs later, sitting in a Manhattan-bound New York subway.

Now that's a roller-coaster ride even Walt Disney never dreamt of!!

Do svidaniya

After watching a recently released Hindi movie "Dasvidaniya", I was awed by the brilliance with which the script has been written. The work of the cast is also beyond excellence, especially the protagonist. I could not but praise the work of every single person involved in it's making. However, the movie did lead to a few hours of sleep-deprivation for me. Not because, it gave me a head-ache or anything.

My gray cells were perturbed by a thought, rather the question mark that this movie had etched on my forehead. And I couldn't help but wonder, what would I do if I knew I only have a few months left to live. Would I like to make a "List of things to do before I die"? Or, would I just wake up each day and do whatever I wish. I think I am more of a list person. But, then there are some lists you wish you never have to make. Is this one of those lists? Would I ever like to know how much time I have left?

I think most of us are better off living in an oblivion - of not knowing how much time we have left! Because, not everyone is well-equipped to handle that situation. And they don't even teach that in Disaster Management!

Well, where I started was whether I would like to know beforehand or not, and whether I would make "the" list? The answer, I guess, would be - no, I would not like to know, rather I would like to go away by surprising even myself - all of a sudden. One moment you're there, and the next you're not. That would be my coveted end. However, I do realize that I might sound very selfish here. But, gotta be true to myself.

And the answer to the second question is - I, kind of, already have a list. But, unlike the character in the movie, I do not have a list that only shrinks. Instead, I have a list that keeps shrinking and expanding. I learn about many more things every day. Each day, I make new aspirations, and add them to my list. And, at the same time, thankfully, I keep crossing things out from it. I am happy that I am lucky enough to have a dynamic list. I am sure this list would not be empty the day I depart, but then if I had done everything I wanted to, I would have ceased to have a purpose to live anyways. That's the last thing I want.

So here's a wish, that may my list be ever-growing, dynamic, and non-empty until the day I breathe.

"My to-do list is so long that it doesn't have an end; it has an event horizon".
-- Craig Bruce